The Cyber Lothario

Are you writing to someone who is romancing you off your feet? Does this guy seem to know just what to say or write that gets you a step or two further down the garden path?

Perhaps more dangerous than the notorious Internet rapists and murderers are the Cyber Lotharios. Maybe you know one. Smooth as silk. Seduction is his native language.

More dangerous, because these guys (well, maybe there are girls too, but I am more familiar with the guys) are GOOD.

These guys are the Internet equivalent of a Bill Clinton, if Bill Clinton hadn't gotten caught. They are the cyber version of handsome -- they write beautifully, know just what you want to hear and tell you. They POUR it on, and for a thirsty woman, it is nectar from the Gods.

These fellows post on dating sites indefinitely, waiting for the unsuspecting newbie to the dating site. You might contact him, he might contact you, but like a used car salesman, he knows a pigeon when he sees one.

Then slowly, softly, but determinably, he has his way with you.

How do you tell if you have one of these guys on the wire? What if he is a really nice guy, really meaning every word he says?

Well, one thing would be if you find yourself agreeing to things that you never would if you were in your right mind. Particularly if that has to do with sex. Or maybe money.

These guys make manipulation feel like a warm bath. You just slide right in and it feels delicious.

But there is a certain vagueness, particularly about past relationships, and perhaps about future plans. These guys may reassure, but they also will leave themselves a way out.

How can you tell?

Well, one thing you can do is ask for a relationship history. Then pay attention to how he responds, as well as what he actually says.

Does he groan and moan about doing the job? Is he grudging in what he tells you? Or is he open and serious, understanding what you are asking and why?

Does he seem to have trouble remembering his own history, what her name was, what order the different relationships came in? Is he reluctant to divulge, or does he sound like he is fudging?

Does he seem to be moving you fast towards a romantic getaway? Maybe he makes plans for the two of you to meet, and reserves only one room. Is he heavily sexually suggestive and titillating? Does he ask questions like "What kind of lingerie are you wearing?"

Even though a new and legitimate relationship can be highly sexually charged, a guy who is seriously interested in you and a possible future with you will be protective and understanding of you and your feelings.

If you feel antsy, pay attention. If your hormones may be doing your thinking, put on the brakes. Better to let this dangerous Clark Gable type swim away than to be left flat and busted.

Kathryn Lord, Romance Coach
Helping singles find someone wonderful!
eBk: "Find A Sweetheart Soon! Your Love Trip Planner for Women""
4870 Oak Ridge Road, Vicksburg, MS 39183 / Ph. 601-619-0030
Stay current with my complimentary enewsletter *eMAIL to eMATE*
Subscribe at http://find-a-sweetheart.com/newsletter.html
www.Find-A-Sweetheart.com / Kathryn@Find-A-Sweetheart.com


More Resources

Unable to open RSS Feed $XMLfilename with error HTTP ERROR: 404, exiting

More Dating Information:

Related Articles

Are Parents Still Stopping You from Having a Girlfriend?
There are a lot of young men who find it difficult to go out and meet new girls on days when they have a quarell with their parents.There are also a lot of older men who can go out easily and have success.
Online Dating Tips - Creating Personal Ads
Creating a personal ad for online dating services is not difficult, but how well you write your personal ads will often be the difference between success and failure in online dating. All the rules that apply to advertising in business still apply, and those who define and attract their target audience will be the successful ones.
Bachelor Dream
Step aside Hugh Hefner. Elvis King is back in the building.
Dating Tips that Work- Which of the Three Types of Women Should You be Dating?
When most "dating gurus" and sex therapists spout their dating tips, they often complicate the whole process with unusable theory and psychobabble.I'm going to bypass that, make it brain-dead simple for you, and most importantly, reveal a few dating tips you can apply in the real world.
Dating Tips For Animal Lovers!
Did you know that experts say the way people treat their pets is indicative of how they'll treat you in a relationship? Minus the sex and relationship talk, having a pet is very similar to a romantic relationship. A pet needs to be cared for, fed, bathed and loved, just like it's human counter part.
A Revolution Has Come To Online Dating
There is truly a revolution going on in the online dating services industry. And it is one that is far overdue.
Finding Your Dream Date Sometimes Takes Guts!
My husband and I used to live in NYC. WE would often take dog for a walk last night to get her and us exercise.
Creating Your Online Dating Profile
Are you considering the possibility of using an Online Dating Site to find the Date or Love of your dreams? Yes? Well, did you know that the most important part of finding your special someone through online dating is your profile. As explained in my book "the Ultimate Online Dating Handbook" even if you plan on being proactive in your search, you will still need a stellar profile.
Meeting Women: Surefire Spots To Get Dates
The first thing I want to do immediately is to give you a CONCRETE, STEP BY STEP PLAN that you can immediately use to go out right now and start meeting more women.Now, most guys have it all wrong when it comes to meeting women.
Internet Dating - It's Not For Geeks
Six months ago an old school friend and I were chatting over coffee, putting the world to rights as women do. She was bemoaning her lack of success in meeting the "right sort" of men.
Guys, Do Your Pickup Lines Always Get Met with Turn Downs?
It's unbelievable how many guys have this problem!I mean, you finally got the courage to walk up to that beautiful girl and tell her a pickup line that you thought sounded amazing and instead of her falling all over you, she acts cool and distant.And basically tells you to get lost.
Summertime and New Romance
The tempertures are rising and romances are in full bloom as we move into the summer months of adventures, vacations and new beginnings.We all love the changing of the seasons and all the surprises that are in store, the flowers are blooming and bring luxurious color to our world, our hearts are opening as we look for love, romance and hot partnerships.
It Pays For Single Christians To Date Other Like-Minded People
Searching for the perfect mate can be one of life's greatest challenges.Afterall, forever is a long time.
Single Women Are Hot
Just when businesses and advertisers think they have women all figured out enters a new category with serious buying power: the single woman. It is projected that in 2005 single women will spend $400 million dollars which has the business world standing up and taking notice.
Still Single for the Holidays? Lucky You!
Oh, no! Christmas, Hanukah, and New Year's Eve are coming, and you're still not dating anybody.The specter of enduring gatherings with relatives who harass you because you've failed to hook up trounces your hopes for peace and goodwill.
Why Settle?
When dating we all too often settle for someone that is not quite right. Why should we ever settle for something that isn't quite right, especially when it comes to person that you hope to have an intimate relationship with? It may be ok to settle for a hamburger when you really want a steak, but when you're dating; you're talking about a relationship that is vital to you as a person.
Immigration and Clear Thinking
I get a lot of "reader comments" on the issues I choose to write about. This is a good thing for my editors since this means more readers and more readers mean more advertising revenue.
How To Have A Successful Conversation With Any Woman!
To have a successful conversation with any woman you must know what to say, and what not to say. Once you have mastered this, your actions or words will never be misinterpreted again.
Have You Tried Online Dating, Only to be Disappointed?
Millions of people subscribe to Online dating services, but very few of them actually take the time to learn what it takes to be successful on them before signing up. By going into the Online-dating scene uneducated, many people are unsuccessful in their online dating endeavors, and are unable to find people that they are compatible with.
Online Dating - Confidence Builder
Most of us have different levels of confidence. I'm sure you have met a variety of confident types.