Table For Two Please!
I recently heard a woman say that she would not date a short man. She doesn't care about how nice he is, educated, godly or anything else - he's short and that doesn't work for her. "I'm a tall woman - I need a tall man." Then I heard another woman say that she would not date a guy who is uneducated. "A guy is not perfect for me if he doesn't have a college degree." Then, I read an article by a brother asking, "What's a brother to do?" He's tired of showing up at a restaurant requesting a table for one. "My goal this year is to hear Towns, party of two." According to Mr. Towns, he's tall - 5'10", dark - not like Wesley Snipes but close, he has big brown eyes - one on each side of his face - that's important, he's articulate, reasonably intelligent, in good health, practices good manners and doesn't burp, scratch or grab himself in public. I'm not mad at that!
There's more; he's romantic, caring, soft-spoken, understanding, compassionate AND passionate, cuddly, sensitive, thoughtful and humble. He thinks that women should be treated with respect, held in high regard, adored, treated like fine crystal, and savored like vintage wine.
Unfortunately, woman #1 would pass him up because he's short - her man needs to be at least 6 ft. If I were her, I would turn his table of one into a table for two to find out what's up with him. Why is he single? Why can't he find a partner? According to he and his friends, his main fault is that he's a "MAN" - a good man. While women are out and about chasing the bad boy -the man with a little thug in him, men like Mr. Towns are often left by the wayside. "Women often tell me that there are no good men left. Wrong! We are everywhere." Women like the two mentioned above have a set of rules and expectations for a mate that often have nothing to do with creating a lasting relationship. These same women complain often that all the good ones are gone. Below are a few pointers for women on how to meet available men like Mr. Towns:
Get the ball rolling
Initiate - stop waiting for men to approach you. Smile, wave, say hello - do something to let a man know that you are interested. If a guy took you out and you had a good time, call him to let him know instead of waiting for him to call you. If he has any common sense, he will know that this is an open door for him to ask you out again and not be rejected.
Cast a wider net
How about dating a guy that's totally different that what you're used too? Obviously what you're used to is not working otherwise you wouldn't be single and singing the blues. Try an older guy or a younger guy, maybe a lighter hue or a darker hue. Take off your artificial height and maybe that 5'10" brother might be all right. Forget about whether he has a degree or not and listen to what he has to say. Remember, if you keep doing the same thing in the same way expecting different results, you are crazy!
Examine & update your list
Ask yourself, "Why will I only date a man with a college degree?" Is that really important to me or is it more important to my family, friends and society? What is it about a shorter man that makes me look the other way? What is it about a blue-collar worker that just isn't good enough for me? Go over your list with a fine toothcomb. If it's giving you the results you desire - keep it if not, burn it and start over.
Stop judging a book by its cover
Get to know men before you write them off. Be interested in learning new things about each man you meet. Have conversations with men just because. Forget about romance or developing a relationship. Instead, focus on learning about him. Be interested in his life. Ask questions that will allow him to share his world with you. Give a compliment. Talk about current events. Relax and enjoy listening to what he has to say. Drop your guard. Be open - be available - be easy to talk to.
Ladies, I can't tell you whom to date or whom not to date - we all have a right to be choosy however if your intention is to create a long-lasting committed relationship with an available man please make sure that your choices are in alignment with your intention otherwise stop complaining about your inability to meet a great man. Then and only then will Mr. Towns hear, "Your table for two is ready!"
Something to think about...
Coach Yvonne
The Single Woman's Cheerleader
http://www.availableandhappy.com
coachyvonne@availableandhappy.com
877-7-RELATE (773-5283)