How to Get the Girl You Want: The Attraction Killer to Avoid and Some Strategies for Success

It's one of the supreme tragedies in life. When there's just one girl you want, it becomes much tougher to get her.

No matter how much of a player some guys are, we've all had that one girl we want. It could be that hot babe in your office who you've had a crush on. Or it could be that beautiful woman in your college class who you dream of having as the perfect girlfriend.

You see, a lot of times guys mess themselves up by focusing on just one girl. That's because having that narrow focus kills whatever attraction she might have for you. This attraction killer is... FEELING NEEDY AND DESPERATE.

When you're needy and desperate, and you start thinking that any girl is one of a kind, then you become like the cartoon lover skunk Pepe Le Pieux chasing the cat. And your odds of success are about the same as his.

So with that in mind, in this article you'll learn strategies for how exactly to stop killing the natural attraction that special girl has for you. Then you'll learn how to maximize your chances to get the girl you want.

Strategy #1: Realize That Other Girls Are Just As Special As She Is

Do not sweat it about that one girl. I promise you that although she may be awesome, there are tons of other girls out there who are just as great as she is.

No matter what good quality she has (silky hair? good in the kitchen? a sense of humor?), there are millions of other hot women with that exact same good quality.

This comes from massive experience... not only from my own two and a half decades dating hundreds and hundreds of women, but from comparing notes with other guys who are good with girls.

Believe me when I tell you, there is literally NOTHIN that any woman has that is unique ONLY to her.

So don't worry about how special she is. Of course she's special -- lots of girls are!

The last thing you ever want to have going through your mind when you're around a girl is, "God, I MUST have this girl! She's irreplaceable!"

So, you're free to think she's amazing. Just remember that lots of other girls are amazing too. That way you won't become too needy.

Strategy #2: Date Other Women to Get That One Girl

Now, I know it's tough to not worry about a woman if she's the only dating prospect in your life right now. So the solution is to make yourself hang out with other girls. This will also pay benefits to you in other ways, using a basic principal of psychology to increase your "value." I'll explain.

You see, whenever a woman sees that other chicks are attracted to a guy, she too feels attraction. Psychologically, this is known as the "social proof" phenomenon... and it's much more powerful in women than men.

To women, the most attractive guy is the one who's surrounded by other women. So, ironically, the best way to get this special girl attracted to you is for her to discover that she'd have to compete with other women.

That way you become a challenge. She's the one who has to win your affections, not the other way around.

Strategy #3: Change Your Mindset About Women to Get That Girl

A simple change in your attitude will cure your feelings of neediness and desperation for any particular woman. Warning: it's politically incorrect. However, it's effective and, ironically, will maximize your chances of getting her.

That change is this... start viewing chicks as "one woman with many faces." That way you won't get too wrapped in any ONE chick.

If you get to know players -- you know, those guys who've slept with dozens of women and can get any chick they want -- you'll find that's the exact attitude that every one of them has.

So forget coming from a frame of neediness. A better frame to come from is the mindset that you have high value, and any attention you give her has been EARNED by her. That way, even though she is the one girl you want, you'll avoid the attraction killer and have the best odds of success.

John Alexander is author of How to Become an Alpha Male, a dating and seduction success system that will maximize your chances of getting that dream woman you've got your eye on. Find out more by visiting http://www.alphamalesystem.com/ebook.html


More Resources

Unable to open RSS Feed $XMLfilename with error HTTP ERROR: 404, exiting

More Dating Information:

Related Articles


Lonely Expats Looking for Valentines Love
Being an expat in a foreign country where you don't speak the language is hard at the best of times. And if you're single with the most romantic day of the year looming, what do you do?You could sit at home and feel sorry for yourself, but the modern expat in Europe is turning to exciting new ways of finding Mr or Mrs Right before February 14.
The Huge Advantages of Online Dating
Imagine the joy of finding the love of your life, an exciting romantic liaison or a rewarding friendship when you are looking and feeling your worst. You had a hellish time at work the previous day, you feel as though you haven't slept a wink, your skin would be a voyage of exploration for a dermatologist and a crow would be more than happy nesting in your hair.
From Friend To Boyfriend
One of the most frequent questions I am asked is "How do I go from being a friend to being a boyfriend?". I'm not going to lie to you and tell you that this is easy to do, but it can be done.
Guys, Do Your Pickup Lines Always Get Met with Turn Downs?
It's unbelievable how many guys have this problem!I mean, you finally got the courage to walk up to that beautiful girl and tell her a pickup line that you thought sounded amazing and instead of her falling all over you, she acts cool and distant.And basically tells you to get lost.
The Theory of Scarcity in Dating
Familiar with the economics theory of scarcity ? Here's a simple way to illustrate the theory; basically this theory says that if the supply of a certain commodity or goods is more than its demand, then the price of the commodity is bound to drop. On the other hand, the reverse is true if the demand is more than supply.
Use The Fated Encounter For First Date Seduction Success
Every woman has a fantasy from the time she was a little girl, triggered by a constant diet of romance movies and novels, about fate bringing the man of her dreams to her.In one typical scene the guy and the girl almost bump into each other on the sidewalk.
How to Overcome The Fear of Rejection
Feeling uncomfortable in the stomach, cold sweaty palm, trembling of legs, losing the ability to think correctly when approaching a girl? Hate yourself for not able to overcome this problem? Oh? please do not feel so. Believe me, you are not the only one facing this problem.
No More Desperation Dating
When you think about what you find attractive in a person, what comes to mind? Tall, dark and handsome? Blonde and curvaceous?How about happy and fulfilled with an exciting life?I don't know about you, but I would pick the happy, exciting life every time. While physical chemistry is important, I know quite a number of people who would not win a beauty pageant, but are so filled with life and energy that they draw the attention of everyone when they enter a room.
Using the Internet as a Method for Adult Dating
In this day and age, many find it hard to find someone that can share their passion and love with. With so many people experiencing a hard time with relationships and many have gone through failed affairs, a multitude have given up and just moved on.
You Might Be A Stalker If....
Okay, so you wanted to know what your boyfriend or girlfriend was doing last night. And you needed to go to the grocery store anyway, so you thought since you were 'in the neighborhood', you would just drive by his or her house.
Christian Singles: Questions To Keep Your Spirit Alive
With special events like Valentine's Day coming and going each year, I am reminded how difficult it can be to retain your spirit of who you are when you're a Christian single.It just sometimes feels like it would be easier to mold yourself into whatever your dating partners want, and then you can get on with living happily ever after.
I Found Love On a Online Dating Site
Over the past few years, I discovered a few personality traits about myself that I wanted to change. When it comes to relationships I have had a hard time changing.
Summertime and New Romance
The tempertures are rising and romances are in full bloom as we move into the summer months of adventures, vacations and new beginnings.We all love the changing of the seasons and all the surprises that are in store, the flowers are blooming and bring luxurious color to our world, our hearts are opening as we look for love, romance and hot partnerships.
Love Discrimination
Why is it people, especially the media, thinks that looking for love on the internet is shameful? The discrimination is particularly evident if you are looking for a foreign bride. I met my wife, Eileen, who is Filipina, on the internet.
How to Create A Romantic Dinner for Two on a Pontoon Boat
Before you pick up the phone to make reservations for that romantic dinner for two..
Co-Dependency
Co-Dependency is an unhealthy reliance on another person for every thought, action, and feeling. It consists of people who seem to be defined by another other person.
The Dating Game
Now you all know I have become a bit cynical in regards to dating lately. Especially since my last burn.
Revealed: What Women Want When It Comes to a Guys Looks
As part of my research for a guide to style, I put together a focus group of 6 randomly chosen hot, single women between 21 and 33, to find out what styles in men they considered hot.My goal was to find the things that they all agreed on.
A Revolution Has Come To Online Dating
There is truly a revolution going on in the online dating services industry. And it is one that is far overdue.
Online Dating Beginners Quiz
Free dating online-you've heard about it, you've read about it, maybe you even have a friend who's doing it. You're thinking of giving it a try yourself.