8 Things That Maketh Not The Lady

1. Tattoos.

Tattoos used to be the colouring of soldiers, sailors, mafiosi and punk rockers. About ten years ago, they became fashionable. The lower-middle classes started taking them up. Unfortunately, unlike last years' shoes, tattoos can't be taken to the thrift shop and disposed of.

To a certain class of person, tattoos are 'cool'. To another, they are a graffito on the temple of the soul. They mark a woman definitively as lower class, alienated, depressed, and a bit daft. They're also a handy way to identify one absolutely to the authorities. Which shows how stupid some crooks are.

The same goes for piercings. My family are farmers. I associate nose rings with bulls, and piercings with cattle tags. They are a haven of dirt, infection, and their openings look unsightly.

With tattoos and piercings, before you've opened your mouth, you've already typed yourself to people you meet.

2. Highlights and streaks.

Are you blonde, or brunette? Make up your mind! These might have been novel ten years ago. Now they just look common. Not all gentlemen prefer blondes. A healthy head of untinted brunette or raven dark hair is a pleasant novelty these days.

It is true that blondes have more fun. I used to be one! Most people on the planet are dark. A non-blonde with blonde hair looks 'interesting'.

Now this fashion is done to death, however. If they're doing it in Romford, it's buried!

3. Big hoop earrings.

Unmistakably part of the wardrobe of the gypsy. Which is fine if you are one. Strangely popular. Perhaps they're to make the wearer's head look smaller. Add them to the features above, and an unattractive type emerges.

4. Binge drinking.

Binge drinking, squawking and falling over in the street is hilarious if you are the one doing it. If you are the spectator, it's less so.

5. Visible G-string.

This is erotic, no doubt about it. Unless you haven't the figure to pull it off. Likely to provoke a reaction of 'Mother of G*d!' when adorning the pasty, blemished buttocks of the 'full-figured' young lady. Bad diet, no exercise, five-pints-a-night, then 'peek-a-boo!'. Agggh!

I used to wonder why so many saucily-dressed young ladies walked the streets hatchet-faced. Now I now. Half are trying to ward off unwanted advances, the other half are annoyed they're not getting any!

There's nothing sexy about contrived, blatant eroticism. What's erotic is what seems to be an accident. 'A glimpse of stocking is something quite shocking' etc.

Likely to irritate female co-workers also. Assuming your company allows such clothing. It doesn't? I wonder why?

6. Swearing.

Your gentleman friends might find this amusing, to your face. What they think in private is another matter. Habitual swearing is another sign of a depressed, angry person. It's unattractive. The more you do it, the more it corrodes your subconscious.

7. Breast Augmentation.

Also known as a 'boob job'. These look fine, from a distance. Compared to a natural pair, they look odd. They are to real breasts what a transvestite is to a 'red hot mama'; no competition. Up close, they're just not as good as the real thing. A perfectly functional piece of equipment has been turned into a cartoon joke, with possible long-term medical consequences.

Some men like small breasts. Beauty is a matter of proportion. Some women are neurotic about their appearance; nothing will please them.

A good example is ...

8. Disappearing Eyebrows.

They get plucked away to nothingness, then get drawn or tattooed back in. And this is better? One can end up looking freakish, even clown-like. Loss of hair suggests illness. Plucking out one's hair is often a sign of mental illness. Girls, desist! Don't try to gild the lily!

IMPORTANT NOTE: There are people who'll encourage you in the above. They'll say you look lovely. Misery loves company, and some people delight in the fall of others.

Be your own woman. Stand back from yourself, your life and your surroundings, and decide your own destiny.

T. O' Donnell ( http://www.tigertom.com ) is an ecommerce consultant and curmudgeon living in London, UK. His latest project is an ebook on conservatories, available at http://www.ttconservatories.co.uk T. O' Donnell freeware may be downloaded at http://www.ttfreeware.co.uk


More Resources

Unable to open RSS Feed $XMLfilename with error HTTP ERROR: 404, exiting

More Dating Information:

Related Articles


Public Displays of Affection: How to Fake It
You see it all the time, and it makes you want to puke. You're telling them to 'Get a Room!' The problem is, the girl by your side secretly wishes you were slobbering on her.
Six Things Every Christian Single Should Know Before Dating Online (Part Two)
In part one, we looked at the importance of remaining anonymous, why you should always ask for a picture of your online dating prospect, and how the Holy Spirit can lead and guide your efforts.In this final segment, we'll talk about the dos and don'ts of making phone contact as well as the all-important first date.
Dear Soulmate
Dear Soulmate,Where are you?? It seems as if I have been searching for you my entire adult life. I am writing this so you will know that I am not giving up on my search for you.
Online Dating Tips - Creating Personal Ads
Creating a personal ad for online dating services is not difficult, but how well you write your personal ads will often be the difference between success and failure in online dating. All the rules that apply to advertising in business still apply, and those who define and attract their target audience will be the successful ones.
Where Should You Go On The First Date?
One of the most frequently asked questions in the history of dating (with the exception of the caveman who was a firm believer in kidnapping and always took his date to a filthy cave) is where should one go on a first date. For starters, there are several places you shouldn't even think about going on a first date.
What are Seduction Lairs?
Are you familiar with Seduction Lairs and how to use them to your advantage?They are around purely for your benefit if you wish to get better with women. If you want to get better with women itwill help you if you find other individuals who share the same goals to keep you motivated and learn from.
Im Looking for Mr. Right, Am I Too Picky?
Many of my clients that I coach are single and looking for that one perfect mate that is going to understand and love them. Most of these clients are in their 20's 30's or early 40's.
Internet Dating - It's Not For Geeks
Six months ago an old school friend and I were chatting over coffee, putting the world to rights as women do. She was bemoaning her lack of success in meeting the "right sort" of men.
What Appeals To Women About Badboys
What is it about the attraction of Bad Boys?A lot of women have said they are attracted to bad boys. If you wonder why than read on.
Dating After Fifty
Dating at an older age is not too hard. And it can be a lot of fun especially with internet dating.
Change Your Body Language to Be Relaxed When Approaching Somebody New
Get a Girl To Seduce You By Changing Your Body Language.Your attitude and confidence are directly connected to your body language.
How to Create A Romantic Dinner for Two on a Pontoon Boat
Before you pick up the phone to make reservations for that romantic dinner for two..
Your Online Personal Ad- Write For Success!
Where are all the good men/women? You go to parties, sign up for various activities and ask friends and family if they know anyone they can introduce you to. Yet, your dating life has been more than a little disappointing.
Dating Options for Christian Singles
As a Christian, you understand that to visit bars, nightclubs, and many other worldly establishments is not the way for you to meet your mate. The people who hang out there may be nice, but they don't share the same values as you do.
Reading People: Body Language Briefing
Body language is the meaning behind the words or the"unspoken" language. Surprisingly, studies show that onlyup to an estimated 10 percent of our communication isverbal.
You Dont Have To Be A Genius To Write A Love Poem
Love poems are a wonderfully romantic gesture and can often express your thoughts far more eloquently than verbal communication.If you have some talent with words, why not take a few moments and try your hand at writing a poem for your lover? Just sit down and list all the reasons why you think they're special.
What Do You Do on Valentines Day When You Have 1000 Girlfriends!
Valentine's Day was initially an outgrowth of an ancient Roman festival honoring the goddess Juno, Roman Goddess of Marriage or a subsequent celebration of St. Valentine, a martyred Roman who protected the institution of marriage during his life by secretly marrying couples, in defiance of the Emperor's ban, until he was put to death on February 14, 269 A.
How To Find A Dating Web Site That Is Right For You Today Starting From Scratch
So at last you're sick and tired of the bar scene, and now you want to find a dating web site that's right for you, but you don't know where to begin! No worries let us take you through a few options available and see what dating site will fit your plans!Now the first step you may want to do, is write down on a piece of paper the key tools you're most interested in using, and the ones that will assist you in reaching the right dating community online.You might think this is not an important step, but what this does is eliminates the dating sites that have unnecessary products that won't help in your search for the right people, whether it's to meet friends, or a life long partner for love and possible marriage.
How To Approach Women
Now, let's start at the very beginning, what's the first thing you have to do before starting a conversation with a girl? Yeah, right, approach her! That's the first step you have to take - how to approach woman. Succeed in this direction and you can move on to the conversation part or else, kiss your chances with this particular girl good bye.
Online Dating - 5 Essential Safety Tips
So, you've decided to take the plunge and follow in the footsteps of countless other singles who know that online dating is a successful route to meeting new friends and finding the perfect partner. But, what do you do when you find someone you like?Initially, you'll want to keep all communication by email and get to know a little more about the other person.