Dont Seek Success; Seek Self-Actualization

"You make a living by what you get.
You make a life by what you give."

So said Winston Churchill. Cooperation and giving is better for you than competition and taking.

Competitors do not see it this way. To them, making money is an overriding goal so they and their families can live in "style." In the name of money they run in the rat race. When they win and become CEO rats, they wonder why they are depressed and unhappy with their lives.

The reason is simple. They do not have a larger purpose. There is no meaning in the work they do. They are not being helpful to people. They are not givers, but takers. They are not cooperators but competitors.

Cooperators have a vision to serve other people. If they help others by doing what they love to do they eventually reach self-actualization.

Self-actualization is the highest need in Abraham Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs:

  • PHYSIOLOGICAL - Basic living needs, such as food, water, oxygen and sex

  • SAFETY - Once physiological needs are satisfied, you need to have a home and other forms of security

  • BELONGING - So far you have taken care of yourself. Once you do this, you look to make friends, find someone to love and in general feel part of a community

  • SELF-ESTEEM - You need self-confidence, to be appreciated for what you are and be treated with dignity

  • SELF-ACTUALIZATION - This is the highest level. Once your basic needs are supplied, you seek ways to reach your highest potential

Maslow also said:

"Ours is a money and power society, and so long as it is, it is thereby insecure."

Yet most people chase money so they may be called a success. Success, what would you do to achieve it? What would you give up in order to win? Would you do what you hate in order to make millions of dollars? Would you slavishly follow rules laid down by others in order to ingratiate yourself with them and thereby get "promoted"?

Do you want to live in the fast lane? According to John Jensen there is one thing wrong about it:

"The trouble with life in the fast lane is that you get to the other end in an awful hurry."

Competing wildly to make piles of money so that you would be recognized as a success, while all your personal relationships fall apart, seems to be the goal of many. Does it make sense?

You can achieve the real thing, self-actualization, by seeking ways to help other people in your area of expertise while pursuing what you love to do. Pursuing what you love to do beats competing for success. Instead of working hard, you do not work at all. Doing what you enjoy can not be called work. Instead of sacrificing your body, mind and spirit in the interest of making a buck, you do as you wish. Mark Albion thinks it is a shame to sacrifice this way. He says:

"Do what you love. Whether or not money follows is not vital. What's vital is that you won't be wasting your life."

Instead of being rewarded by others, reward yourself. The great dancer, Baryshnikov, got it right when he said:

"I do not try to dance better than anyone else.
I only try to dance better than myself."

Instead of traveling in the fast lane, travel in your own private lane.

Self-actualization brings people contentment and happiness. Self-actualization comes easily to cooperators and with difficulty to competitors.

Cooperators may affect not only their own lives and the lives of their family members, they have an impact on the world. Yes, they do. Most of us are skeptical about this because we feel helpless compared to the great leaders and shakers of the world. But Margaret Mead cheers us on:

"Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed it is the only thing that ever has."

Be a cooperator. Do what you love. Serve others. Reach self-actualization. Make life better for you as well as for the world.

About The Author

Paul Siegel is the author of "WE DON'T AGREE, BUT... How to Live in an Age of Terrorism," from which the above article is adapted. The book may be obtained from Amazon.com for $17.95. The article may be used freely, provided the author and the book source are acknowledged. The author is also called Paul "the soaring" Siegel because of his performance on the platform.

More Resources

Can You Change a Man?
Recently, at a public function where I was the Toastmaster, an elegant lady in her early 30s walked up to me and asked: 'Can a woman change a man?' Instead of giving her a direct answer, I asked her: 'can anybody change you from being you?' She said: 'No'. The truth is that no woman can change any man except the man himself decides to change.
Do You Have Tickets To Your Dream Theater?
I'd like you to do an exercise with me.I want you to use your imagination to construct a dream theater.
Increasing Money by Conquering Personal Fear and Greed
One of the first lessons that "Rich Dad, Poor Dad" teaches is about understanding and controlling fear and greed. Many people go to work and work hard not to learn more and to grow, but out of fear that they won't have enough money to pay their bills.
Choose Your Friends, Choose Your Fate
When I was about 10 years, I got a t-shirt from my uncle and aunt that said "It's hard to soar with the eagles when you're hanging out with a bunch of turkeys." I really didn't know what it meant at the time, so I didn't think anything of it.
Heal Thyself First
As I connect with more and more women I am seeing that many have a desperate need for a man. I had one woman tell me that her ex-boyfriend put a gun to her head and told her to get out of his life.
Who Wants to Work?
I feel a loss when pragmatism wins over the mystical. There is a greater magic at work when you engage with Source.
How to Develop the Genius within You
Inside each one of us there's a seed of greatness, a seed of genius. You are a special and complete human being and so is everyone else.
Beads-A Sign of the Times?
When you hear the word "beads," do you immediately think of jewelry? Or do you think of Rosary beads or some other non-jewelry use of beads-beaded dresses, headbands, belts? Perhaps you think of a country and western outfit, a studded, head-to-toe piece of jewelry.The first thought that enters your mind when you hear the word "beads" may date you and give away your age faster than physical attributes.
Use Your Vibrations of Energy to Communicate Part 2
"The speed of electromagnetic energy signals is 186,000 miles per second, while the speed of a diffusible chemical is considerably less than one centimeter per second." -Bruce LiptonAs electromagnetic spectrums of energy we have a unique energy signature.
Limited Thought, Limited Experience
I was reminded once again the other day about how well we limit ourselves and take on the values of others and their limitations.I was in one of our morning sales meetings and just barely awake trying to concentrate on other things.
Do You Have the Skills to be a Secret Service Agent?
Do you have the necessary attributes to be a successful secret services agent? Do you melt into the background where no one can see you? Do you hide behind someone else? Would you describe yourself as having an incognito life? Are you capable of always putting yourself second? Do you constantly defer to another person? Do people see right through you and ignore you?Then you have the skills.You see, as John Reilly, states in the song he wrote for the musical Chicago; you are no more than Mr.
So, The Thing Is... We Reap What We Sow
So, the thing is? we reap what we sow.A few weeks ago, my daughters and I planted some seeds.
Success, Opportunity, Carl, and Kenny G
A couple of weeks ago I celebrated my anniversary by taking my wife to see one of her favorite musicians - Kenny G.Now, I have to be honest, I was dreading the event.
How To Influence People
Most of your success in life will come from your ability to deal effectively with other people. Your success will be determined by the number of people you know, and who know you in a favorable way.
Invisible Braces, Viable Solutions
Invisible braces, like Invisalign, are most popular among adults. For children and young teens, having traditional braces cemented to their teeth is almost a rite of passage.
Releasing Your Potential
In life, few people ever step up to live their lives at a higher level. They spend their lives wallowing in the circumstances that surround them.
Manifesting Your Abundance
I believe in myself, therefore, I have all that my heart desires.Rejection and failure are simply perceptions.
Would You Rather Be Wealthy?
Would you rather be wealthy or poverty-stricken? Not a difficult question to answer, is it? How do you think your thoughts impact on your financial state?Just as the earth contains in its depths great riches--oil, diamonds, gold, uranium, silver, gas and countless other things--you also have the real riches of life deep within you. Your innate intelligence and your willingness to use your mind are precious.
Change Your Mind, Shift Your Life
Everyone can draw from the Universal Reserve Bank. What is it, you ask?It has taken me years of inner searching to realize the answer!I have come to believe each human being is wealthy.
4 Helpful Ways To Beat Shyness
Over half of all adults identify themselves as shy. Shyness can get in the way of developing personal relationships and professional aspirations.

More Attraction Information:

Related Articles

Wayne Dyer - 20 Abundance & Prosperity Quotes
Dr. Wayne Dyer has been an inspiration for me for at least two decades now and below I wanted to share with you my favorite 20 quotes of his that relate to creating abundance and prosperity: "There is no scarcity of opportunity to make a living at what you love; there's only scarcity of resolve to make it happen.
Character or Reputation
Character or Reputation. When we see these two words together, we often mistakenly believe that you cannot have one without the other.
Mirror, Mirror
The Concept of Beauty"Mirror Mirror on the Wall, who's the most beautiful of them all?"This is a line spoken by the Queen in the children's fairy tale "Snow White"The Queen most likely, was once the most beautiful woman in the kingdom; expected only to hear the Mirror confirm that fact.To the Queen's dismay The Mirror had exchanged her beauty for that of Snow White's He pulled down the Queen's Beauty position replacing it with that of her Snow White's.
Better Tame The Bull, Or, Youll Eat The Crow!
A man can stand a lot? as long as he can stand himself. Success is never Final and Failure is never fatal.
Will You Be Part of the Bigger Picture?
With all the media attention you've probably become aware that there is something huge going on in the world, but are you part of this bigger picture?Day-to-day you'll be busy contributing to your household: cleaning tidying, earning money and taking care of your partner's and your children's needs as best you can. On a home front you've probably got it sorted.
Creativity, The Law of Attraction, & Networking
Hello Creative Entrepreneurs!I hope this finds you all doing well and living & loving your passions!Today I want to talk about creativity, the law of attrcation and networking.Let's start with creativity--YOUR creativity! Creativity is limitless.
Jerry Green's Top Ten Adversity Busters
I've navigated plenty of speed bumps on life's road. My father's death led me to an entirely different career than my planned one.
How To Actualize Your Potential
Are you tired of struggling and trying to realize your dreams, yet constantly missing the mark? You know your potential but just keep on missing it.How do you know when you have actualized your potential? When you are in your full potential, there is an experience of joy.
Why Do We Settle? You Have the POWER to Change the Outcome
Why do we settle for less and then make excuses for everyone? Perhaps it is a way to avoid confrontation, or it could be that we simply don't have time, or choose not to deal with poor customer service and the boss who promised a raise that never quite made its way to our paycheck. Those are some of the possibilities, but there is another option- we settle, or make excuses, for others because we have given away our power to the other person involved in the equation.
Reminding Yourself of Prosperity
Have you ever heard the phrase, "Thoughts are things and words have wings?" This phrase is the perfect expression of the principle of prosperity. How you think about and talk about your level of prosperity is what actually manifests in your life.
100 Ways to Keep Your Lover - Happy - At Home!
Here are over 100 ideas to help you keep monogamy hot!1. Find out what music your lover likes, and play it.
Ten Tips For Setting (And Keeping) Life Changing Resolutions
It's time for that annual ritual of making (and breaking) our New Year's resolutions. There is something about the idea of being able to start over that motivates us to pause (at least briefly) and reflect on our lives as they are, as well as how we would like them to be.
Living Abundantly: May the Force Be With You!
Perhaps, you have heard the phrase "May the force be with you" from your favorite Episode of the Star Wars movies. The Star Wars movies explore the power of our choices, the wonder of destiny, and the manifesting power that is in us and all around us.
Do You Have Your Best Life?
For many years I had a good life. My illness was reasonably under control, I had a nice relationship with my husband, I did work I didn't hate.
What is it That You Want, Honey? Discover Wealth and Prosperity with the Angels of Abundance
As you already know, the Angels are here; ready to assist us but how can they assist us if they aren't control freaks or butt-in-skees? Obviously, they don't butt in. I have never heard my Angels telling me that I "should" do something.
How Do You Choose To Deal With Your Life?
"It's choice - not chance - that determines your destiny." --Jean NidetchIt is not what happens to us in our lives that is important, but how we choose to deal with it.
Reminiscing About Your Past Can Stimulate Your Future
Have you ever thought much about how some of your past experiences and talents influenced how your life turned out? I sure have and I've found it not only interesting but valuable, too. Whatever the case, I believe we can all find value in reminiscing about our past.
Harvest Moon Lessons
The full moon in September is often bigger and brighter than full moons in other months. It is usually referred to as the Harvest Moon.
How Anyone Can Manifest Anything!
My mother taught me how to teach others about the power of the mind. By learning how to teach her, I learned how to communicate essential wealth-building ideas to others.
Attract Your Ideal Relationship Using the Law of Attraction
First, I'll need to explain what Law of Attraction is and how it works. You see, the Law of Attraction states that you'll attract to your life whatever you give your attention, energy and focus to, whether wanted or unwanted--emphasis on the unwanted.